“For in this manner [with a gentle and quiet spirit], in former times, the holy women who trusted in
God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed
Abraham, calling him lord…” (1 Peter 3:5-6). (Emphasis added.)
Sarah submitted. How do I know? I see it in God’s word. For clarity, The Amplified Bible reads: “For it was thus that the pious women of old who hoped in God were [accustomed] to beautify themselves and were submissive to their husbands [adapting themselves to them as themselves secondary and dependent upon them]” (1 Peter 3:5). (Emphasis added.) So what does that tell us? The pious women of old (who hoped in God), esteemed their husbands first, recognizing their dependence on them, and yielded accordingly. What does that tell us? Simply this: they were beautiful because their beauty flowed from submitted hearts which produced authentic beauty - their gentle and quiet spirits.
The Message Bible says: “Cultivate inner beauty, the gentle, gracious kind that God delights in.” Then the text schools us on Sarah’s actions, by explaining: “The holy women of old were beautiful before God that way, and were good, loyal wives to their husbands. Sarah, for instance, taking care of Abraham, would address him as “my dear husband” (1 Peter 3:4-6). Note that “my dear husband is also translated lord, master, or my dominion. The concluding point is this: The communicated message is clear in all transliterations. Sarah honored God by submitting to her husband - Abraham!
Although God’s message is clear, biblical submission is perhaps the most misunderstood, debated discipline of all. Women hate the topic, and particularly today, it seems that they have missed its significance and spiritual benefits. But that’s not all. They have overlooked God’s love through the process! But take notice! Submission is not a punishment! Even so, thinking it’s an outdated or old-fashioned ideal, women choose to ignore its scriptural foundation, dismiss its unique purpose, and miss its rewards. But that’s not all. Some confess that “their husbands are not doing as they should (either),” so they inquire, “Why should I submit if he’s not doing right or earning my respect?”
Before we move forward, note these important facts. First, another’s failure never absolves us of biblical compliance. Each of us will be accountable for what we know and do in response to God’s commands. Next, from the language, notice that wifely submission is an absolute command! (There is no wiggle room available.) Our obedience is not conditioned on another’s behavior, attitude, or disposition towards us. Especially our husbands! We submit because it’s God’s plan - that’s despite what they’re doing! That is scriptural. Our hope is not in our husbands but in God. So watch this closely: Submission is a faith issue. When the call to submit comes, the question is: “Do you trust God enough? Can you confidently obey God’s word despite the circumstances or consequences? That’s biblical faith!! Can you do so joyfully - in a way that honors God and trusts Him regardless?” Notice: even though we submit to our husbands, our submission is ultimately to God.
Even after that explanation, some remain confused and push against God. So if you’re unsure of its benefits, you’re not alone. But here’s what I learned over time. Although submission seems restrictive, it’s quite the opposite. It frees us because it pleases God, unburdens our hearts and souls, grows our faith, shapes our marriages, and strengthens our children. Here’s why: Nothing will fortify your children more than seeing your God-honoring faithfulness unfold through submission. Their faith will be encouraged as they see your devoted love (for God), steadfast compliance, and hope in God - not yourself or your husband. Ladies, that’s a valuable life lesson with their souls (and ours) and eternity in view. It teaches them to trust God. So, as we move through our lesson, let’s consider these truths:
1.) Many benefits are derived through godly submission; 2.) Submission matters to God, so it must matter to us, and 3.) Submitting to our husband (as unto the Lord) is a command and part of God’s plan, one that glorifies and pleases Him! (See Ephesians 5:22.)
Please pause and read Genesis 12:1-5. It’s the biblical record of Abraham’s call which was unprecedented. Why? Abraham heard from God! What did God want? To establish faith on the earth and begin a relationship with us, humanity - the pinnacle of His creation. So He called a people through Abraham and Sarah to love, follow, and worship Him. Not to oversimplify this life-changing invitation, but so you know, the invitation hasn’t changed through the ages. God is still calling, and we are still coming to faith in record numbers. (Note: Yahweh is the Old Testament God they worshiped.)
Soon after Abraham and Sarah began to follow God, a famine came to the land. Due to its severity, Abraham’s inexperience in following, and the recent timing of their arrival in the Promised Land, Abraham thought it prudent to migrate to Egypt, where food was plentiful. Even though that seems logical, Abraham had previously moved when God commanded, “Get out of your country….” Now, however, he moved forward by his authority. Did you see that? Abraham moved without inquiring of God, even though he had heard from God. Remember, he had received and accepted God’s unprecedented command and divine guidance. Abraham was to follow God. After all, his faith-igniting call was “to a land that God would show him...” not to anywhere Abraham decided to go!
On a side note, in case you overlooked the obvious, that was Abraham’s first mistake. Even though he had believed God and they hastened their departure from Ur, now Abraham doubted God’s keeping hand! But it was more than that. His escape to Egypt was a considerable departure from God’s plan. Moreover, it tragically laid the platform for other mistakes and consequences that would plague the couple throughout their journey. Through it all, Abraham remained God’s chosen vessel, and that’s the backstory of our lesson. Before we get too invested in Abraham’s part of the story, let’s return to consider Sarah’s. Lest we forget, she was on the journey, too, but watch closely. The responsibility for this error was not hers! She willingly complied, but the responsibility for the misstep lay squarely with Abraham. God allowed Pharaoh to bless her faithfulness amid Abraham’s mistakes. Sarah came through this portion of their story in better standing than Abraham.
Here is why. Upon entering Egypt, Abraham coerced Sarah to lie about her identity. Why? First because he could, and second, because he feared for his life instead of his wife’s. Even though her safety should have been his first priority after honoring God, Abraham feared for himself. What was his specific fear? In Genesis 12:12-13, we read Abraham’s confession to Sarah: “Therefore it will happen, when the Egyptians see you, that they will say, ‘This is his wife’; and they will kill me, but they will let you live. Please say you are my sister, that it may be well with me for your sake, and that I may live because of you.” Note Abraham’s sinful two-fold folly: deception and fear!
What did Sarah do? She obeyed her husband. She submitted to his request. Albeit true, she was a stunning beauty at the age of 65, this lie set them up for a greater failure, and their testimony about God was not received in Egypt. So what’s always at stake when we disobey God? The Gospel! Believer, remember: a bad witness always jeopardizes the gospel’s power and authenticity! But there was more! Abraham received a humiliating and public reprimand by a pagan ruler and was thrown out of Egypt.
Interestingly, although Sarah submitted to Abraham and also lied, joining in the deception, they received a blessing, and we’ll see it momentarily. But first, let’s consider why she lied. Her compliance was two-fold. She submitted to Abraham’s deceitful plan because her call was to submit. Her submission is notable, but see that her primary interest was protecting Abraham’s seed. Since God had promised children, Sarah wanted to protect him and his seed at all costs. Although two wrongs never make things right, and lying is always a sin, here’s what happened next in Genesis 12:16. When Abraham’s folly was discovered, Pharaoh was furious. Of course, he publicly called Abraham out about his deceit, but with God’s approval, Pharaoh had already blessed them. The Bible says: “He [Pharaoh] treated Abram well for her [Sarah’s] sake.” (Note: God began to build their wealth here in the midst of the folly! Incredible! Why? It suited God’s needs and prepared Abraham for the future. God doesn’t change His mind or His plans. Sure, Abraham got off track, but he was still the one God chose!)
What’s the takeaway? The prophet Samuel told King Saul, “Obedience [in all things] is better than sacrifice” (1 Samuel 15:22). God wants us to obey Him in all things. Even though Sarah was blessed, she knew their deception was wrong, as did Abraham. Hagar joined them here, and Pharaoh’s blessing proved not to be such a blessing over time. Her presence and “offering through surrogacy” became a thorn in Sarah’s side that festered until God cast Hagar and Ishmael out in Genesis 21. So even in our obedience, we must not sin because sin never changes. Dr. Wayne Grudem reminds us that sin is sin and shall always be “any failure to conform to the moral law of God in act, attitude, or nature.”
Prayer: Mighty and gracious Lord, help us have submitted hearts that honor you and your Word! Keep us faithful and bless us in the process. Thank you, Jesus! Amen and amen.
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